The Kingdom of New Tallinn is a colossal, genial nation, ruled by Kiïm Joöng Uün with an even hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, anti-smoking policies, and keen interest in outer space. The compassionate, democratic population of 9.556 billion New Tallinnians enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Education, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Estonia. The average income tax rate is 85.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient New Tallinnian economy, worth 931 trillion Kronor a year, is quite specialized and led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Basket Weaving. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 97,427 Kronor, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Students are known to arrive at school in their pyjamas, cities are engulfed by smog, skateparks can be found in every city, and government crews work tirelessly to retake the suburbs from organized packs of raccoons. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. New Tallinn's national animal is the emu, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Tallinnianism.

New Tallinn is ranked 285,968^th in the world and 6,806^th in the Rejected Realms for Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector, scoring -14.76 on the Henry Ford Productivity Index.