The Kingdom of Apnestan is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by King Mahdi Shah I of Apnestan with an iron fist, and remarkable for its state-planned economy, unlimited-speed roads, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 1.732 billion Apnestanis are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Wasighat. The average income tax rate is 71.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Apnestanian economy, worth 235 trillion Apnestani Rupees a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Book Publishing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 136,176 Apnestani Rupees, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Lobster tastes best when it is red, only fully-fledged members of MENSA are allowed to vote, the army consists of only generals and grunts, and unpopular politicians are often caught between a rock and a hard place. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Apnestan's national animal is the Red Squirrel, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Islam.

Apnestan is ranked 52,904^th in the world and 2,907^th in Lazarus for Most Cultured, scoring 71 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.