by Max Barry

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Fire! Fire!

by Max Barry
Sun, 26 Oct 2003

It is my sad duty to report that a great fire at the United Nations Headquarters wiped out entire filing cabinets worth of UN Delegate lists last night, throwing entire regions into Delegacy chaos. Regions such as The Pacific, which were formerly quiet, peaceful havens of iron tyranny, are now in a state of Delegate-free uproar.

Actually, it may have been a system crash. The fire is unconfirmed. But what is certain is that the United Nations bureaucrats are even now scurrying back into action to update their vital Regional Delegacy records. Very shortly, in each region, the nation with the most endorsements will again be officially appointed its Delegate.

The UN wishes to convey its apologies for the inconvenience, and stress that no nation has lost any endorsements. In the meantime, those nations frightened by this new Delegate-free world order, particularly those in the Pacific, are encouraged to inhale deeply and smell the liberty. Or is it smoke? It's hard to tell.