by Max Barry

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The Highest Crime Rates in the South Pacific

World Census interns were dispatched to seedy back alleys in order to determine which nations have the highest crime rates.

As a region, the South Pacific is ranked 13,681st in the world for Highest Crime Rates.

NationWA CategoryMotto
1.The Wastelands of NothreenCorporate Bordello Patriotic Business Zone“My way or the highway”
2.The Serene Democracy of Bear Connors ParadisoInoffensive Centrist Democracy Communists“What is love? Baby dont hurt me, dont hurt me, no more.”
3.The Seafood Paradise of KohrArCorporate Police State Entrepreneurial Freedom Zone“With oysters we thrive!”
4.The Eternal Misfortune of Pencil Sharpeners 2Compulsory Consumerist State Aspirational Worker State“Stop Reading My Motto!”
5.The Republic of OlongonAnarchy Lawless Wasteland“You Can't Stop Progress”
6.The Please Push Up Endorse Cap of Hong Kong Kowloon and New TerritoriesAnarchy Lawless Wasteland“Make Hong Kong great again”
7.The All Inclusive Love and Pride of JehennaLeft-wing Utopia Drugged-Out Hippies“We love you just the way you are!”
8.The Unwavering Love of Land With Lots of ShrimpAnarchy Lawless Wasteland“Can I trade in the children for more cash?”
9.The Freople of SoemLeft-Leaning College State Deluded Tax and Spend Hypocrites“Wealth tax, cap the richest (10% top 10, 1% next 100)”
10.The Red Panda Clan of SyvaniAnarchy Lawless Wasteland“Force of Togetherness”
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