by Max Barry

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The Fattest Citizens in Africa

World Census takers tracked the sale of Cheetos and Twinkies to ascertain which nations most enjoyed the "kind bud."

As a region, Africa is ranked 8,172nd in the world for Fattest Citizens.

NationWA CategoryMotto
1.The Democratic Republic of CongoCapitalist Paradise Decent Hardworking Self-Starters“Justice – Paix – Travail”
2.The Confederacy of EdgetownCapitalist Paradise Decent Hardworking Self-Starters“ARE YOU RECORDING BRO”
3.The Kingdom of LoangoFather Knows Best State Suspiciously Liberal Dictatorship“Tenacity, Pugnacity, Domesticity.”
4.The Republic of PeppercoastCapitalist Paradise Decent Hardworking Self-Starters“Liberty, Freedom, Justice”
5.The Republic of NaajCapitalist Paradise Decent Hardworking Self-Starters“Bene askane bene yité bene geum geum”
6.The Sheikhdom of TrarzaIron Fist Consumerists Champions of Commerce“Allah’s Chosen”
7.The Republic of ZoowanatouIron Fist Consumerists Champions of Commerce“Zoowanatou Forever”
8.The Kingdom of MabanmangaPsychotic Dictatorship Communist Dictatorship“Mabanmanga Forever”
9.The Allied States of SandikaCapitalist Paradise Decent Hardworking Self-Starters“Sandika's Special Sandals!”
10.The Kingdom of MbangawiIron Fist Consumerists Champions of Commerce“Baraka Ufalme Cha”
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