by Max Barry

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DispatchAccountDrama

by The 3ast3r 3gg Tyranny of Aivintis. . 256 reads.

Crap Flags: Mr. Worldwide (this is a funny dispatch please click itís not making fun of you I swear itís making fun of me)

Disclaimer: This is satire. If you don't like satire, don't speak to me or my son ever again. Plz no get offended

Since the days of Antarctic SARNZ blah blah blah ad offensa blah blah blah THIS IS BACK YALL! This time, Iím Mr. Worldwide. Huuuuge thanks to Middle Barael for the suggestion, really sorry it took this long.

<EDIT> The joke was that this dispatch was so low effort that I couldnít even bother to copy paste the intro, but I feel the need to explain. This is a satirical dispatch where I take peopleís flags and badly recreate them in PicCollage. Not even MS Paint thatís how bad this is. I call it CrapArt, based on JoCatís Crap Guide series. </EDIT>

The Most Patient Flag in the Universe

Not a new country anymore boio, but this is a marvelous work of art. With my phone losing the ability to save transparent backgrounds on images, this knockoff Middle Baraelian flag is an accurate representation of how good my flags are now when I actually try. Actually speaking legit right now: A flag being cool is not dependent on the complexity or skill of the flag maker. A flag is cool when it actually works and when it fits your nation really well, so the real deal is not inferior to anyoneís.

Sir Kin of the Round Table

This is the flag of Serkin. Prominent appraisers can notice the flawless quality specifically of the cross, which represents a rather authoritarian perversion of Switzerland, totally 100% not at all like my own flag when I was literally trying to be a perversion of Switzerland.

just when I thought I had a lot of puppets, this region had to come in andó remember what your therapist said Lerasi deep breaths let the anger subside

Flag of Chicken Overlords. Yes it has a mullet. Yes I should ping South His Majestys most loyal kangaroos about it. Yes those are two shades of green. No you canít have an embassy with TEP you need a consulate first and itís a whole process.

Andusre but I put zero effort into the flag

Uh huh, you know what it is. Literally the only effort I put into this was looking up who wrote black and yellow and finding the first lyric to the song. This is peak performance for me. Itís only downhill from here.

Inhuman Insanity - AKA My Nickname After Butchering So Many Flags

This beautiful masterpiece of a flag is dare I say even better than HumanSanityís actual flag. The stars are plucked directly from the heavens themselves, the green is a photograph of Irish fields, and the blue is a photograph of deep roiling oceans. I actually donít know what roiling means but I think Iíve heard it used to describe oceans so whatever.

Pitchonia

The irl totally legit flag of Pichtonia. This flag is literally the flag of Pichtonia. I actually just saved the file from the flag of Pichtonia, uploaded the file from the flag of Pichtonia, and put in the flag of Pichtonia. Also itís pink so it may be a Valentineís Day special, but the point of this is that the effort is crap so Iím not gonna ask like a responsible person or anything like that. Also also if youíre reading this youíre legally obligated to pet the doggo.

Ringing Sounds

This is the animated flag of Chimes, except itís not. I was actually trying in this one this is an actual representation of my art skills. I am so so sorry for this I actually liked this movie what have I done. Oh crap the rose is the wrong color.

Euri Egg Hunt V5 but itís not an egg hunt itís just insulting me

I donít know how to do 3D text.

B R E A D

This is the flag of A Leaf on the Wind. This is actually effort guys this is why you should upvote this dispatch. Fun fact: This is actually a 4K image of an oak leaf floating in the wind. Isnít nature beautiful?

Itís vertical like a tiktok haha look how relatable I am to todayís youth please upvote this dispatch

Why am I putting effort into this what. Anyway this is Agalaesia skiing the slopes. Enjoy this flag of AlagaŽsia.

McFlag of McMasterdonia

This is the most complicated McFlag that Iíve ever made in McCrapArt. This McMasterpiece makes use of pure McGold for the yellow parts, with McWhite and McRed occurring commonly throughout the McFlag. The McCoat of Arms was the most difficult part to do. I hope you like it, McMasterdonia.

----Heaveria----

Heaveria is looking better than ever in this pristine photograph. The quality of the art is really noticeable in the Eagle, which is traced from an actual photograph of a real bald Eagle whose feathers were bleached white. This flag is so realistic, itís practically appointing foreigners to secure regional power and oppress RPers because thatís obviously what Heaveria does on a daily basis and itís absolutely not a far fetched conspiracy theory. A member of the Illuminati such as I would never espouse conspiracies.

The Life Syndacite

This is the flag of the The Death Syndicate! And itís another Eagle! I absolutely 100% certainly without a doubt definitely for sure DID NOT draw over the Heaveria flag for this. These are baseless allegations and I will see you in court.

lol

Flag of Gufand. For this, I literally just have a two year old a box of crayons. Iíve already been mistaken for Gufand with it. Itís so realistic that Iíve taken the Falkland Islands, rightful British clay, for Argentina. Buy today for only 19.99

Sparsdan (pretend this is super fancy text that you canít read)

Flag of Sparsdan!!!!!!!!!! Presidentó wait noó Vice President of The Free Nations Region. What a privilege amirite? Vice Leaders are totally 100% better than regular leaders and Iím not just saying this because I was Vice Delegate no no no I thought this before. Also I forgot to click away from the text box but thatís alright.

Nurses Orvos

This flag of Doctors Orvos has convinced me to rebuild the Roman Empire. I am busy with my conquests, and thus cannot write a suitable joke for this description.

North Europeans

This flag of South Asians is a delicacy in the vexilolololololologist world. Iíve seen it twice before, in black market auctions. Itís so authentic itís already prosecuting a dozen nations for treason with hundreds of files submitted as evidence. The court is overwhelmed but the money I make from selling these flags is literally zero and thatís more than what I already have, so canít stop wonít stop. (Btw the thing in the center is fire)

New Leg Pains

This is the totally real flag of New Leganes. As you can see here, I got the colors right and I even drew the two birds on the flag - those were probably the hardest parts. This flag definitely screams ďI have too many islandsĒ, and you gotta love the nice purple color on this flag. The one downside of this however, is that the flag is almost alive, and cries out in pain at its tortured existence as a bad joke has tried to hug too many people. Doesnít it know thereís a pandemic out? (Seriously guys my phone canít register transparency thatís the best I could do for the kiwis.)

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