by Max Barry

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Most Influential: 406thLargest Gambling Industry: 802ndLargest Cheese Export Sector: 968th
The Songhai Empire of
Father Knows Best State Suspiciously Liberal Dictatorship
Isa gu ba da gu ba tontoni.
Mansa Ayub Askiya I
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population12.844 billion

LeaderMansa Ayub Askiya I
FaithSunni Islam

CurrencyNkan goolu ₦
AnimalBlack crowned crane

The Songhai Empire of Yarosluv is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Mansa Ayub Askiya I with an iron fist, and notable for its compulsory military service, unlimited-speed roads, and multi-spousal wedding ceremonies. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, cheerful, devout population of 12.844 billion Songhai are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The relatively small, corrupt government prioritizes Defense, with Industry and Education also on the agenda, while Spirituality and Welfare are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Aito. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 52.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Songhai economy, worth a remarkable 3,288 trillion Nkan goolu ₦s a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Gambling. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 256,052 Nkan goolu ₦s, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 820,923 per year while the poor average 60,580, a ratio of 13.6 to 1.

Cotton candy made from genuine cotton cellulose doesn't quite satisfy, a widely accepted trade policy is "tit-for-tat", the youth vote is only counted when kindergarten teachers ask who drew the best picture, and signatures have been replaced with illegible scribbles. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Yarosluv's national animal is the Black crowned crane, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Sunni Islam.

Yarosluv is ranked 170,986th in the world and 160th in Commonwealth of Liberty for Most Ignorant Citizens, with 0.84 Missed References Per Hour.

Most Influential: 406thLargest Gambling Industry: 802ndLargest Cheese Export Sector: 968thMost Armed: 1,028thHighest Crime Rates: 1,192ndMost Efficient Economies: 1,409thMost Subsidized Industry: 1,521stMost Rebellious Youth: 1,651stLargest Black Market: 1,738thTop
Largest Publishing Industry: 1,871stMost Devout: 2,142ndMost Advanced Defense Forces: 2,192ndLargest Soda Pop Sector: 2,605thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2,702ndMost Cultured: 2,739thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2,895thHighest Average Incomes: 3,078thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 3,112thHighest Economic Output: 3,386thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 3,679thMost Cheerful Citizens: 3,828thHighest Disposable Incomes: 4,368thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 5,225thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 7,435thLargest Governments: 7,792ndTop
Smartest Citizens: 9,146thMost Scientifically Advanced: 10,924thLargest Information Technology Sector: 13,008thMost Advanced Public Education: 13,272ndMost Beautiful Environments: 14,134thRudest Citizens: 14,764thMost Corrupt Governments: 14,896thMost Developed: 15,087thLargest Populations: 16,893rd
Most Rebellious Youth: 3rd in the regionMost Influential: 4th in the regionLargest Black Market: 4th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 4th in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 4th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 4th in the regionMost Armed: 4th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 5th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 6th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 6th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 6th in the regionMost Devout: 7th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 8th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 9th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 9th in the regionTop
Largest Manufacturing Sector: 10th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 10th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 10th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 12th in the regionMost Cultured: 12th in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 13th in the regionLargest Populations: 15th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 19th in the region

National Happenings

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