by Max Barry

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Largest Welfare Programs: 1,933rdMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 2,125thSafest: 2,196th
The Grand Duchy of
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy Communists
Suus Cuique Modus Est
Civil Rights
Political Freedom
Very Good

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

West Zirconia

Population29.038 billion

CapitalSt Martin
LeaderGrand Duke Robert IV


The Grand Duchy of West Zirconia is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Grand Duke Robert IV with an even hand, and notable for its daily referendums, ubiquitous missile silos, and compulsory military service. The compassionate, hard-working, devout population of 29.038 billion West Zirconians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked morass — juggles the competing demands of Education, Law & Order, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of St Martin. The average income tax rate is 96.2%.

The frighteningly efficient West Zirconian economy, worth a remarkable 3,563 trillion crowns a year, is highly specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an impressive 122,729 crowns, with the richest citizens earning 5.9 times as much as the poorest.

Occam's razor has sliced to pieces any childhood belief in Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy, children gain their first sex education from reading the dictionary, there are six more weeks of winter if a northerner sees his shadow, and children fear compulsory visits to their spiritual advisors more than the dentist. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. West Zirconia's national animal is the meerkat, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

West Zirconia is ranked 1,933rd in the world and 4th in Rushmore for Largest Welfare Programs, scoring 9,866.64 on the Safety Net Mesh Density Rating.

Largest Welfare Programs: 1,933rdMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 2,125thSafest: 2,196thTop
Most Advanced Public Transport: 2,690thLargest Populations: 3,424thMost Advanced Public Education: 3,671stMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 3,874thLowest Crime Rates: 3,933rdHighest Average Tax Rates: 4,236thHighest Economic Output: 4,483rdMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 4,673rdMost Cheerful Citizens: 5,301stMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 5,494thLongest Average Lifespans: 5,814thMost Cultured: 5,917thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 6,451stMost Developed: 6,454thHealthiest Citizens: 6,521stLargest Governments: 6,871stBest Weather: 7,481stMost Beautiful Environments: 7,619thHighest Food Quality: 8,928thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 9,682ndSmartest Citizens: 10,277thLargest Publishing Industry: 10,890thTop
Nicest Citizens: 13,719thMost Devout: 13,921stMost Subsidized Industry: 16,573rdMost Compassionate Citizens: 17,880thMost Efficient Economies: 20,941stMost Pacifist: 23,234thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 24,381stHighest Average Incomes: 24,818thMost Inclusive: 25,179th
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 3rd in the regionSafest: 4th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 4th in the regionMost Patriotic: 4th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 4th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 4th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 4th in the regionTop
Most Devout: 6th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 6th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 6th in the regionMost Cultured: 7th in the regionMost Developed: 7th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 7th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 7th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 8th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 9th in the regionLargest Governments: 9th in the region

National Happenings

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