The United States of Wars Forever is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by CATS with an iron fist, and remarkable for its zero percent divorce rate, keen interest in outer space, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 31.689 billion Wars Foreverians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The tiny, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Industry and Law & Order also on the agenda, while Environment and Social Policy are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Underground Ketchup. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Wars Foreverian economy, worth an astonishing 18,581 trillion dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Retail. Black market activity is notable. Average income is a breathtaking 586,381 dollars, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 3,441,134 per year while the poor average 46,677, a ratio of 73.7 to 1.

Policemen regularly conduct midnight raids on closed donut shops to 'collect evidence', industry tycoons rarely hide their misdeeds due to the government's habit of bailing them out, hedge fund managers are diversifying into herbaceous borders, and jaywalkers are condemned to lives of poverty for their heinous crimes. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Wars Forever's national animal is the Giant enemy crab, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Atheism.

Wars Forever is ranked 1,112^th in the world and 3^rd in Wysteria for Lowest Crime Rates, with 167.19 law-abiding acts per hour.