The Federal Republic of RetroBeaners is a huge, safe nation, ruled by El Don de Paradis with an even hand, and notable for its state-planned economy, keen interest in outer space, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed population of 894 million RetroBeanersians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Paradis. The average income tax rate is 78.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient RetroBeanersian economy, worth 113 trillion Libras a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, and Retail. Average income is an impressive 127,332 Libras, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Tourists are forbidden to enter Native RetroBeanersian lands, a faint smell of body odour can be detected at several miles' distance from the National Science Park, voters must frequently select what they view as the lesser of two evils on the ballot, and the government loves seeing the little people fight. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. RetroBeaners's national animal is the Monarch, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

RetroBeaners is ranked 190,545^th in the world and 8,020^th in The North Pacific for Most Extreme, scoring 10.02 on the Paul-Nader Subjective Decentrality Index.