by Max Barry

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Most Armed: 1,200th Largest Gambling Industry: 1,318th Highest Crime Rates: 1,324th
The Jingoistic Military Junta of
Capitalist Paradise Decent Hardworking Self-Starters
I have pneumonia
Eminence Grise
WA Delegate
Civil Rights
Political Freedom
Below Average

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Pinochet Executionists

Population2.611 billion

LeaderGeneral Pinochet
FaithNo Swearing Christian Server

CurrencyChilean Peso

The Jingoistic Military Junta of Pinochet Executionists is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by General Pinochet with an even hand, and renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, aversion to nipples, and smutty television. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 2.611 billion Chileans are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The tiny, corrupt, pro-business government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Industry, Administration, and Education are also considered important, while Welfare and International Aid receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Santiago. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 8.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Pinochet Executionistsian economy, worth 468 trillion Chilean Pesos a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Gambling, and Soda Sales. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is an impressive 179,407 Chilean Pesos, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 717,272 per year while the poor average 30,149, a ratio of 23.8 to 1.

Crowded passenger trains are near-silent save for the soft tap of fingers on touchscreens, suppression of pro-democracy protests is a daily occurrence, criminals rejoice in the streets as the entire police force is sent away on a training retreat, and drunk leprechauns pelt countryside ramblers with gold coins (Pinochet Executionists has found 7 easter eggs). Crime is all-pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Pinochet Executionists's national animal is the Snek, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is No Swearing Christian Server.

Pinochet Executionists is ranked 2,749th in the world and 4th in Lardyland for Highest Wealthy Incomes, with 717,272.48 Standard Monetary Units.

Most Armed: 1,200thLargest Gambling Industry: 1,318thHighest Crime Rates: 1,324thRudest Citizens: 1,373rdLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1,626thLargest Retail Industry: 1,715thTop
Highest Unexpected Death Rate: 1,771stFattest Citizens: 1,838thMost Avoided: 1,970thMost Devout: 2,208thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2,439thHighest Disposable Incomes: 2,667thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 2,749thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 3,227thMost Corrupt Governments: 3,473rdLargest Mining Sector: 4,564thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 6,258thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 6,469thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 7,716thHighest Average Incomes: 7,828thMost Influential: 8,191stTop
Largest Insurance Industry: 8,970thMost Efficient Economies: 9,758thLargest Black Market: 9,975thMost Pro-Market: 10,806thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 11,252ndHighest Drug Use: 12,759thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 12,844thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 16,590th
Rudest Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1st in the regionMost Influential: 1st in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 1st in the regionTop
Largest Gambling Industry: 2nd in the regionMost Devout: 2nd in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 2nd in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 2nd in the regionMost Armed: 2nd in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 3rd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 3rd in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 3rd in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 3rd in the regionFattest Citizens: 3rd in the regionLargest Black Market: 4th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 4th in the regionMost Avoided: 4th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 5th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 5th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 6th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 6th in the regionMost Cultured: 6th in the regionTop
Most Subsidized Industry: 9th in the regionLargest Populations: 9th in the regionHighest Drug Use: 11th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 11th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 12th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 13th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 14th in the regionLargest Governments: 14th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 15th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 15th in the region

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