by Max Barry

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Most Subsidized Industry: 24thMost Ignorant Citizens: 29thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 30th
The Oppressed Peoples of
Corrupt Dictatorship Corrupt Liberal Dictatorship
living hand to mouth
Bad Bessie
Influence
Minnow
Region
Civil Rights
Some
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Rare

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Next Meal

Population10.681 billion

CapitalThe Pasture
LeaderBad Bessie

CurrencyHelping Hands
AnimalHandsy Human

The Oppressed Peoples of Next Meal is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Bad Bessie with an iron fist, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, fear of technology, and lack of airports. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 10.681 billion Next Mealians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Administration, although Industry, Healthcare, and Environment are also considered important, while Welfare and Spirituality receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Pasture. The average income tax rate is 99.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Next Mealian economy, worth a remarkable 3,671 trillion Helping Hands a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, quite specialized black market in Retail, Furniture Restoration, Uranium Mining, and Basket Weaving. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 343,711 Helping Hands, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Nobody is forced to join the armed forces, the nation refuses to discard its increasingly useless penny, scenic tours are unheard of after most environmental laws were abolished, and protesters are up in arms over new nuclear power stations. Crime is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Next Meal's national animal is the Handsy Human, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Next Meal is ranked 14,773rd in the world and 113th in 10000 Islands for Most Stationary, with 1,791.63147141068 days.

Top
1%
Most Subsidized Industry: 24thMost Ignorant Citizens: 29thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 30thMost Primitive: 31stLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 48thMost Corrupt Governments: 58thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 85thMost Avoided: 97thHighest Crime Rates: 122ndHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 137thFattest Citizens: 159thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 280thMost Armed: 280thLargest Retail Industry: 285thMost Advanced Public Transport: 485thMost Efficient Economies: 559thLargest Black Market: 811thLargest Mining Sector: 917thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 942ndHighest Poor Incomes: 1,094thHighest Average Tax Rates: 1,478thHighest Average Incomes: 1,855thLargest Governments: 2,246thRudest Citizens: 2,310thTop
5%
Highest Economic Output: 5,422ndMost Secular: 7,164thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 12,234thMost Valuable International Artwork: 13,589thNudest: 14,025thMost Stationary: 14,773rdTop
10%
Most Influential: 14,967thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 26,987th
Top
1%
Most Avoided: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1st in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 1st in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 2nd in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 2nd in the regionMost Primitive: 2nd in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 3rd in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 3rd in the regionFattest Citizens: 3rd in the regionMost Armed: 4th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 4th in the regionLargest Black Market: 7th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 8th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 8th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 8th in the regionTop
5%
Most Advanced Public Transport: 10th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 12th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 19th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 23rd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 31st in the regionNudest: 36th in the regionRudest Citizens: 37th in the regionLargest Governments: 37th in the regionTop
10%
Highest Drug Use: 55th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 76th in the regionMost Secular: 80th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Next Meal, protesters are up in arms over new nuclear power stations.
  • : Following new legislation in Next Meal, scenic tours are unheard of after most environmental laws were abolished.
  • : Following new legislation in Next Meal, the nation refuses to discard its increasingly useless penny.
  • : Following new legislation in Next Meal, nobody is forced to join the armed forces.
  • : Next Meal was reclassified from "Psychotic Dictatorship" to "Corrupt Dictatorship".
  • : Following new legislation in Next Meal, Next Meal's Medieval Faire is renowned as one of the best in the region.
  • : Following new legislation in Next Meal, the nation's wilderness is only teenage wasteland.
  • : Following new legislation in Next Meal, newspapers print only headlines.
  • : Following new legislation in Next Meal, the government-run newspapers insist that everything is fine.
  • : Following new legislation in Next Meal, groups of three or more trees are cut down in the name of 'child safety'.

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