The Protectorate of Longo Empirial State is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by General Long with an iron fist, and notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, ubiquitous missile silos, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 1.787 billion Longo Empirial Citizens are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The relatively small, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Administration, Law & Order, and Education also on the agenda, while Spirituality and Environment aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Jenna. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 12.0%.

The thriving Longo Empirial Statean economy, worth 146 trillion LONGO HEADS a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Woodchip Exports, Door-to-door Insurance Sales, and Uranium Mining. Average income is 81,714 LONGO HEADS, with the richest citizens earning 8.8 times as much as the poorest.

General Long has just been declared ruler of Longo Empirial State in an international press conference, baby boys who pick up pink crayons are sent to a psychiatric ward, the army's use of chemical weapons leaves a bad taste in the mouth, and international collectors know that a grease-stain on a work of art probably means it's passed through Longo Empirial State. Crime, especially youth-related, is well under control, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Longo Empirial State's national animal is the Cat, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Longo Empirial State is ranked 182,325^th in the world and 7,984^th in Balder for Lowest Crime Rates, with 58.23 law-abiding acts per hour.