The Despotate of Khayamala is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Shlomo Goldbergstein with an iron fist, and remarkable for its museums and concert halls, avowedly heterosexual populace, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 5.266 billion Khayamalans are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Environment, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Khalmer-Yu. The average income tax rate is 72.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong Khayamalan economy, worth 258 trillion soms a year, is quite specialized and led by the Trout Farming industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Basket Weaving, and Tourism. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 49,171 soms, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The military refers to helpless combatants offering surrender as "sitting ducks", the Holy Office of the Inquisition is the highest court in the land, mandatory state-funded classes teach Libertarianism, and organ donation is compulsory. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Khayamala's national animal is the polar bear, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Shamanism.

Khayamala is ranked 38,333^rd in the world and 2^nd in Nova Satus for Most Politically Apathetic Citizens, with 53.09 Whatever.