The Holy Empire of Headcrabians is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Nyarlathotep with an iron fist, and renowned for its ubiquitous missile silos, public floggings, and digital currency. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 22.393 billion Headcrabiansians are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The tiny, corrupt, moralistic, pro-business, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mega Therion. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Headcrabiansian economy, worth a remarkable 9,978 trillion corpses a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an amazing 445,623 corpses, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 4,165,209 per year while the poor average 4,119, a ratio of 1,011 to 1.

No-one can foil the ambitions of Big Aluminium, politicians frequently make unusual poses during speeches in hopes of inspiring the next internet fad, retirees make up the bulk of foreign students, and dynamite sales and concert audiences are booming. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force. Headcrabians's national animal is the human, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Forceful fornication with feti.

Headcrabians is ranked 71,216^th in the world and 3,480^th in Balder for Most Authoritarian, with 1,328.24 milliStalins.