by Max Barry

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Rudest Citizens: 3rdLargest Retail Industry: 4thMost Avoided: 6th
The Walled Cities of
Capitalist Paradise Decent Hardworking Self-Starters
בתחבולות תעשה לך מלחמה‎
Influence
Minnow
Civil Rights
Very Good
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Very Good

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

EretzIsrael

Population20.437 billion

Capitalיְרוּשָׁלַיִם
LeaderBenjamin Satanyahu
FaithSatanism

Currencyשקל
Animalgazelle

The Walled Cities of EretzIsrael is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Benjamin Satanyahu with an even hand, and notable for its rum-swilling pirates, complete lack of prisons, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 20.437 billion EretzIsraelians are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The minute, corrupt, pro-business government, or what there is of one, prioritizes Industry, although Defense is also considered important, while Environment and Welfare are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of יְרוּשָׁלַיִם. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient EretzIsraelian economy, worth an astonishing 15,786 trillion שקלs a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Gambling, and Uranium Mining. Average income is a breathtaking 772,454 שקלs, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 7,205,612 per year while the poor average 7,324, a ratio of 983 to 1.

The population's jaw muscles put sharks to shame, anti-government political posters adorn every building like wallpaper, town welcome signs list corporate sponsors, and piracy is the nation's most popular pastime. Crime is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. EretzIsrael's national animal is the gazelle, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Satanism.

EretzIsrael is ranked 7th in the world and 1st in The North Pacific for Fattest Citizens, with 99.38 Obesity Rate.

Top
1%
Rudest Citizens: 3rdLargest Retail Industry: 4thMost Avoided: 6thMost Corrupt Governments: 7thFattest Citizens: 7thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 8thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 12thLargest Gambling Industry: 13thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 16thMost Secular: 16thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 17thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 20thHighest Disposable Incomes: 24thLargest Insurance Industry: 34thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 38thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 40thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 52ndHighest Average Incomes: 53rdLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 59thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 64thMost Armed: 64thHighest Crime Rates: 69thMost Efficient Economies: 69thMost Scientifically Advanced: 69thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 74thLargest Mining Sector: 76thLargest Agricultural Sector: 156thHighest Economic Output: 157thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 202ndLargest Manufacturing Sector: 650thLargest Information Technology Sector: 880thMost Pro-Market: 1,787thTop
5%
Most Stationary: 3,485thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 4,051stLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 4,093rdLargest Governments: 4,273rdMost Subsidized Industry: 5,200thLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 6,265thLargest Populations: 7,284thMost Valuable International Artwork: 7,396thLargest Black Market: 8,458thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 10,509thLargest Publishing Industry: 11,700thTop
10%
Most Influential: 12,017thSmartest Citizens: 12,145thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 18,103rdHighest Drug Use: 18,876th
Top
1%
Highest Wealthy Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Secular: 1st in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 1st in the regionRudest Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 1st in the regionFattest Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Avoided: 1st in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1st in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 1st in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 1st in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 2nd in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 2nd in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 2nd in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 2nd in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 3rd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 3rd in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 3rd in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 3rd in the regionMost Armed: 3rd in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 4th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 4th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 5th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 8th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 8th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 27th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 51st in the regionMost Stationary: 80th in the regionTop
5%
Largest Populations: 104th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 174th in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 205th in the regionLargest Governments: 237th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 314th in the regionHighest Drug Use: 325th in the regionLargest Black Market: 358th in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 380th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 412th in the regionTop
10%
Largest Publishing Industry: 589th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 647th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 664th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, piracy is the nation's most popular pastime.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, town welcome signs list corporate sponsors.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, anti-government political posters adorn every building like wallpaper.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, the population's jaw muscles put sharks to shame.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, ships are encouraged to deliberately run aground onto EretzIsraelian beaches.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, a murderous reputation can revitalise a flagging celebrity career.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, Benjamin Satanyahu makes and breaks shaky peace deals in 140 characters or less.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, grannies get pulled over for knitting pullovers while driving.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, exports are stamped with "made by the invisible hand you commies".
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, competing private ambulances racing to be the first to traffic accidents are a major cause of road accidents.

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