by Max Barry

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Most Avoided: 1stMost Corrupt Governments: 1stMost Secular: 7th
The Exalted Supremacy of
Iron Fist Consumerists Champions of Commerce
Crush Their Spirits and You Will Control Their Minds
Influence
Truckler
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Rare

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

East Borland

Population35.183 billion

CapitalThe Lair
LeaderHis Supreme Eminence
FaithOppression

CurrencySlave
AnimalGila Monster

The Exalted Supremacy of East Borland is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by His Supreme Eminence with an iron fist, and notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, triple-decker prams, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 35.183 billion East Borlandists are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The tiny, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is effectively ruled by the Department of Defense, with Law & Order and Industry also on the agenda, while Environment and Social Policy aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Lair. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient East Borlandian economy, worth an astonishing 30,479 trillion Slaves a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Uranium Mining, Retail, and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is a breathtaking 866,304 Slaves, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 5,681,935 per year while the poor average 51,719, a ratio of 109 to 1.

Hairdressers are forced to use all the tricks of the trade after citizens became required to wear helmets at all times, breaking rocks in the hot sun now involves using your head, a stocking with a crooked seam or a tie without a full Windsor knot are grounds for instant dismissal, and skateboarding is punishable by heavy fines. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. East Borland's national animal is the Gila Monster, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Oppression.

East Borland is ranked 209,775th in the world and 108th in The Alliance of Dictators for Safest, scoring 1.44 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.

Top
1%
Most Avoided: 1stMost Corrupt Governments: 1stMost Secular: 7thLargest Mining Sector: 8thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 9thLargest Insurance Industry: 9thFattest Citizens: 10thHighest Disposable Incomes: 10thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 11thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 13thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 16thLargest Agricultural Sector: 17thHighest Economic Output: 21stHighest Average Incomes: 22ndLargest Retail Industry: 22ndHighest Wealthy Incomes: 27thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 30thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 31stLowest Overall Tax Burden: 38thMost Ignorant Citizens: 46thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 53rdMost Armed: 63rdMost Efficient Economies: 108thRudest Citizens: 124thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 177thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 188thLargest Governments: 232ndLargest Soda Pop Sector: 256thMost Primitive: 352ndLowest Crime Rates: 365thLargest Populations: 824thLargest Black Market: 1,088thMost Stationary: 1,244thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1,519thTop
5%
Greatest Rich-Poor Divides: 3,695thLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 4,466thMost Influential: 7,586thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 8,412thTop
10%
Most Conservative: 11,176thMost Subsidized Industry: 12,655thMost Valuable International Artwork: 14,146th
Top
1%
Most Ignorant Citizens: 1st in the regionRudest Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Primitive: 1st in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1st in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1st in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 1st in the regionMost Secular: 1st in the regionMost Armed: 1st in the regionMost Avoided: 1st in the regionFattest Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 1st in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 1st in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 1st in the regionTop
5%
Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 2nd in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 2nd in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 2nd in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 2nd in the regionLargest Populations: 2nd in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 3rd in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 3rd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 3rd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 3rd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 3rd in the regionMost Stationary: 3rd in the regionLargest Governments: 4th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 4th in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 5th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 5th in the regionTop
10%
Lowest Crime Rates: 8th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 9th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 10th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, skateboarding is punishable by heavy fines.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, a stocking with a crooked seam or a tie without a full Windsor knot are grounds for instant dismissal.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, breaking rocks in the hot sun now involves using your head.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, hairdressers are forced to use all the tricks of the trade after citizens became required to wear helmets at all times.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, beat cops aren't named for the territory they patrol.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, kids refer to anything below the neck as "the parts that shall not be named".
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, visitors to the famed rainforests are instead taken to vast furniture factories.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, royalist is the most offensive slur in the East Borlandian language.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, the legal system for the political class is completely separate from the one for normal citizens.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, not showing enough enthusiasm for mutual assured destruction is a court-martial offence.

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