The Kingdom of Cartures is a huge, cultured nation, ruled by Maarten Jonathan III with an iron fist, and notable for its complete lack of prisons, free-roaming dinosaurs, and zero percent divorce rate. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 904 million Carturesians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Carturia. The average income tax rate is 79.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Carturesian economy, worth 122 trillion Floreins a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 135,228 Floreins, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.6 times as much as the poorest.

Bread-gangs raid restaurant waste bins to stockpile uneaten rolls, Carturesian tourists are banned from many nations due to their tendency to randomly explode, owning a really cute pet is grounds for immediate investigation, and collisions between bicycles and carnival floats are on the rise. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cartures's national animal is the wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Cartures is ranked 21,321^st in the world and 925^th in The North Pacific for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring 1,125.32 on the Clooney Contribution Index.