The Future of Better Times is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by MrTimes with an iron fist, and notable for its ubiquitous missile silos, frequent executions, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 34.115 billion Better Timesians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The relatively small, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Education, with Industry, Administration, and Law & Order also on the agenda, while Spirituality and International Aid receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of TimesCity. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 21.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Better Timesian economy, worth a remarkable 5,329 trillion Euros a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Uranium Mining industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Woodchip Exports, and Soda Sales. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 156,211 Euros, with the richest citizens earning 9.9 times as much as the poorest.

Sex changes are routinely performed at Better Times's hospitals, the only things written in the stars are arrest warrants for astrologers, political parties are banned from advertising and receiving private donations, and Air Better Times is rumored to receive more government funding than the Better Timesian Air Force. Crime, especially youth-related, is pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Better Times's national animal is the Leeuw, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Atheism.

Better Times is ranked 292,036^th in the world and 103^rd in Vlaanderen for Lowest Crime Rates, with 11.54 law-abiding acts per hour.