The Federal Republic of Azassas is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Noa Snatzel with an iron fist, and notable for its multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, smutty television, and public floggings. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 4.828 billion Azassasians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt government prioritizes Industry, although Education, Defense, and Administration are also considered important, while Spirituality and International Aid are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Agla. The average income tax rate is 66.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Azassasian economy, worth a remarkable 2,165 trillion Azes a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Retail, Arms Manufacturing, and Tourism. Average income is an amazing 448,434 Azes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.3 times as much as the poorest.

Weight loss clubs that guarantee losing a stone a month are talking about misplacing rocks, doctors prescribe medicines but they rarely dispense hope or compassion, going on a diet invalidates your passport, and human resources employees have time for hobbies as harassment is designated "high praise". Crime is totally unknown. Azassas's national animal is the Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Azassas is ranked 44,194^th in the world and 1,465^th in The North Pacific for Lowest Crime Rates, with 76.06 law-abiding acts per hour.