The Republic of Aloadae is a colossal, orderly nation, remarkable for its public floggings, frequent executions, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 8.815 billion Aloadaeans are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Defense, and Industry. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 66.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Aloadaean economy, worth a remarkable 1,540 trillion 9003s a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Woodchip Exports, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 174,784 9003s, with the richest citizens earning 6.2 times as much as the poorest.

Truncheon-mounted cameras record the beating of criminals in dynamic HD detail, grocery stores can be audibly identified by the giggling emerging from them, plain-clothes police officers follow Dàguó tourists everywhere they go, and the needs of the living outweigh the needs of the dead. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Aloadae's national animal is the 9003, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Aloadae is ranked 27,155^th in the world and 1^st in acclamatory for Lowest Crime Rates, with 84.5 law-abiding acts per hour.