The Rooster Cogburn of Unclear is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by John Wayne Jr with an even hand, and remarkable for its unlimited-speed roads, soft-spoken computers, and otherworldly petting zoo. The hard-nosed, hard-working population of 2.242 billion Unclearians enjoy extensive civil freedoms, particularly in social issues, while business tends to be more regulated.

The relatively small, corrupt, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of True Grit. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 40.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Unclearian economy, worth 416 trillion Piracies a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Retail, Information Technology, and Soda Sales. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 185,690 Piracies, with the richest citizens earning 7.0 times as much as the poorest.

Aspiring authors begrudgingly help proofread issue submissions (Unclear has found 2 easter eggs), arguments about toilet seats being left up or down get surprisingly heated, you gots to be part of the Party to get in to the party, and Unclearian faces have never been brighter. Crime, especially youth-related, is a major problem, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Unclear's national animal is the John Wayne's Wolf, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Westernism.

Unclear is ranked 223,885^th in the world and 323^rd in Astoria for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring -5.48 on the Clooney Contribution Index.