The Grand Duchy of Noukia is a huge, orderly nation, renowned for its avowedly heterosexual populace, punitive income tax rates, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 278 million Noukians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized morass — prioritizes Law & Order, with Defense, Healthcare, and Education also on the agenda. The average income tax rate is 72.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but sluggish Noukian economy, worth 4.87 trillion Noukian Marks a year, is quite specialized and led by the Cheese Exports industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Uranium Mining, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 17,502 Noukian Marks, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Military instructors tire of being asked for another bedtime story by seven-year-old conscripts, black market eau de toilette is made in bathroom labs across the nation, the most popular stadium acts are one-off performances, and the institution of marriage is held sacred and strictly enforced. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Noukia's national animal is the Northern Pintail Duck, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Noukia is ranked 93,740^th in the world and 69^th in Byzantion for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring 268.93 on the Clooney Contribution Index.