The Civilisation Game of Mastodonia is a gargantuan, genial nation, ruled by Shepard Blaine with a fair hand, and remarkable for its keen interest in outer space, free-roaming dinosaurs, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 12.351 billion Mastodonians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, liberal, socially-minded government prioritizes Education, with Administration, Environment, and Healthcare also on the agenda, while Defense and Spirituality receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The City. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Mastodonian economy, worth a remarkable 2,792 trillion Postagestamps a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing and Tourism. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 226,056 Postagestamps, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Medical experts advise that those claiming to be medical experts are probably fraudsters, farting etiquette is taught in schools, obstetricians are not allowed to publish ultrasound pictures of fetuses in medical journals, and almost every singles' party has a clergy and courtesans theme. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Mastodonia's national animal is the mastodon, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Project Pope.

Mastodonia is ranked 131,122^nd in the world and 474^th in 10000 Islands for Most Patriotic, with 12.14 flags saluted per person per day.