The People's Republic of Lortonica is a huge, orderly nation, notable for its compulsory military service, irreverence towards religion, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, cynical population of 204 million Lortonicans are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Education, and Healthcare. The average income tax rate is 68.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong Lortonican economy, worth 13.3 trillion Fuluses a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Trout Farming industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Door-to-door Insurance Sales, and Information Technology. Average income is 65,297 Fuluses, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Many politicians are serving jail time for minor drug offenses, truncheon-mounted cameras record the beating of criminals in dynamic HD detail, Scoutmasters debate whether luxury log cabins defeat the purpose of camping, and high-tech infantry rifles automatically reload when the soldier shoots outside the screen of their helmet HUD. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Lortonica's national animal is the Sea Lion, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Lortonica is ranked 43,423^rd in the world and 256^th in The Communist Bloc for Most Patriotic, with 30.57 flags saluted per person per day.