The Dictatorship of Krattler is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Friend von den Pol with an iron fist, and remarkable for its state-planned economy, restrictive gun laws, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 2.24 billion Krattlerians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Great Epikorban. The average income tax rate is 67.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but inefficient Krattlerian economy, worth 99.0 trillion kratts a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, quite specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing and Book Publishing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 44,182 kratts, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Enemy agents are generally eliminated with extreme prejudice, aggressive promotion of global warming puts polar bears on thin ice, strange looking men with big red noses are found hiding behind bushes and inside dustbins, and motorists' locations are constantly tracked by intelligence and law enforcement agencies. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Krattler's national animal is the jackdaw, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Krattler is ranked 181,502^nd in the world and 286^th in Refugia for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring zero on the Clooney Contribution Index.