The Colony of Haiwaido is a huge, genial nation, notable for its irreverence towards religion, punitive income tax rates, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate population of 425 million Haiwaidoans are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Industry, and Education. The average income tax rate is 54.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong Haiwaidoan economy, worth 24.2 trillion Tuns a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Basket Weaving, Book Publishing, and Pizza Delivery. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 56,878 Tuns, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Sales of pregnancy testing kits are booming, people who get diabetes can sue donut manufacturers, parents seeking custody have to write a five-thousand word analysis of their child's imaginary friend, and teams of painters are converting road signs from horse lengths to kilometers. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Haiwaido's national animal is the Seagull, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Haiwaido is ranked 146,041^st in the world and 340^th in Talonia for Most Patriotic, with 9.65 flags saluted per person per day.