The Socialist People's Republic of Belkanov is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Comrade General Secretary Moskvin with an iron fist, and notable for its infamous sell-swords, parental licensing program, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 13.692 billion Belkani are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The enormous, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Dubnalya. The average income tax rate is 94.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Belkanic economy, worth a remarkable 1,929 trillion Elburs a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing and Furniture Restoration. Average income is an impressive 140,904 Elburs, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Conductors wield diamond-encrusted batons to fit in with their freshly gilded surroundings, would-be emigrants are told "abandon all hope all ye who would exit here", the national Police Academies have dedicated infant wings, and protestors are soaking piles of Elburs in blood to make a point about government incomes. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Belkanov's national animal is the Bear, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Belkanov is ranked 16,622^nd in the world and 105^th in The Communist Bloc for Most Patriotic, with 51.7 flags saluted per person per day.