The Shell Company of Ardezistan is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by The Zombie of John D Rockefeller with an even hand, and renowned for its ritual sacrifices, triple-decker prams, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 1.969 billion Ardezistanis are free to succeed or fail in life on their own merits; the successful tend to enjoy an opulent (but moralistic) lifestyle, while the failures can be seen crowding out most jails.

The tiny, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Defense, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Iliad. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 4.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Ardezistanian economy, worth 280 trillion MoneyBux®s a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Gambling, and Arms Manufacturing. Black market activity is notable. Average income is an impressive 142,497 MoneyBux®s, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,080,848 per year while the poor average 5,246, a ratio of 206 to 1.

Wedding bands come in pairs to form wedding manacles, homeowners are evicted to make way for new runways, athletes are renowned for being the best at maths, and a milk bath costs more than bathing in money. Crime is a problem, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Ardezistan's national animal is the Bull, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Capitalism.

Ardezistan is ranked 284,544^th in the world and 10,574^th in Lazarus for Most Cultured, scoring 47 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.