The United Archipelago of Abersiania is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Captain Haug with an iron fist, and renowned for its lack of airports, ritual sacrifices, and anti-smoking policies. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 3.333 billion Abersianians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Schoefengen. The average income tax rate is 65.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The Abersianian economy, worth 298 trillion Abersianian Pounds a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 89,461 Abersianian Pounds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.5 times as much as the poorest.

Exceptionally healthy police officers can sprint after crooks for hours on end, kids feel more beat up than ever after a hard day at school, protesters are up in arms over new nuclear power stations, and napalm is the tool of choice for disabling eco-unfriendly forestry operations. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Abersiania's national animal is the Abersian Bull, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Abersiania is ranked 276,425^th in the world and 779^th in Concord for Safest, scoring 6.2 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.